I have come to a sad realization. I have passed that time in my life when I can look at something deep fried and covered with chocolate sauce (Hooray for Seinfeld re-runs!) and think, “this will be mine.” Now, I must think, “I can order this, but I will be done with it in two tiny bites. Then, what to do with the other $3.75 of my $4.00 raspberry white chocolate cheescake/peanut butter, caramel, & chocolate pie/Marble Slab ice cream mix?” I suppose it can go home…and sit in the fridge…and maybe I’ll finish it before it turns green. And of course, we all know exactly where those 1,200 calories posing as an accompaniment to a meal is going to go…and it isn’t going to be pretty.
This makes me a little sad. I know that it’s just part of getting older…dang metabolism. I can even look on the bright side and think of all the money I’m saving now that I don’t burn off calories faster than I consume them…dang cheapskate Megan. And I’m mostly smart enough and have mostly enough willpower to mostly resist the siren call of the dessert. Mostly.
But geez, is it hard work sometimes. I do love sugar. And caramel (aka burnt sugar). And chocolate. You know, some people say that chocolate can be a little good for you. It’s probably not true, but I’ll play along. So…scratch that. And raspberries. Wait…raspberries probably have some sort of vitamin content. Scratch that, too. And…marshmallows (aka air puffed sugar). And peanut butter. Hmm…ok, fat content aside, peanut butter has some iron. That can be good. More scratching.
Where was I? That’s right, confessing my love for processed sugar and grumbling about changing metabolism. Grumble grumble grumble.