So THAT’S How It’s Going to Be

Hey, everyone. I know, I’ve been MIA for awhile. There are a few very good reasons for that:

1. I haven’t been running. Do you know how depressing it is to have a running blog when you’re not running? I mean, sure, you can blog about random stuff like your adorable, almost 6-month-old baby and fine veggie food that freaks your husband out just by its very PRESENCE in the freezer, but you know that people are bound to notice eventually.

2. I’ve been busy. Mega busy. Little man starts “real” daycare next week (don’t get me started…it’s a necessity that will have its positive sides, but I’m constantly on the verge of a major, guilt-trip propelled freakout), and Grandma Marilyn had to go back to work two weeks ago. (She’s a high school librarian who lovingly gave up 2 days a week all summer to watch the little man. Isn’t she nice?) That means that I was down to ONE complimentary babysitter and TWO days a week of uninterrupted work. I’m lucky enough that my boss has been AWESOME and allowed me to track my own hours and get to 40 any way I possibly can during the rest of the week. This has been amazing and I’m grateful, but it’s really very hard to get 40 hours a week in AND keep track of/entertain the baby AND get some sleep AND run AND attempt to keep the cat hair from taking over the place. I’m exhausted.

3. I threw a baby shower for my brother and sister-in-law. Why not? It’s not like I was busy or anything, right? It was a lot of fun. I had people play a game where they gave Broskies and his Wifey a piece of parenting advice, and the parents-to-be gave them a certain number of “rings” to try to toss around baby bottles filled with candy. It was fun but I maybe made it a bit too difficult, as only one person managed to “win” outright. (I gave the bottles out as favors afterwards, because I’m a nice hostess like that.) I know a couple of readers who are expecting their first children, so I’m going to share my favorite pieces of advice here:

  • From the dog owner — Don’t let them poop on the floor. Ah, yes. Universal advice.
  • From the mom of a 1-year-old — In the first year, what they really need most of all is your love.
  • From the mom of a 17-month-old — Be prepared for everything to take twice as long to do, and to have to change your plans at a moment’s notice.
  • From Scott — Eat small meals and drink lots of water…if you want to be able to run, you have to be ready to go at a moment’s notice. A lot of the time, that’s at a really weird time of the day. This is true, and it’s especially difficult when BOTH parents want to get a run in.
  • From the dad of a 17-month-old — Accept all the help that your family and friends are willing to give. It’ll keep you sane and they’ll LOVE it.
  • From a dad-to-be — When you think you’ve run out of patience, dig deep and find some more.

4. People (receptionist at the doctor’s office, distant relatives, randoms) keep thinking that my boy’s name is JAKE. Don’t get me wrong, Jake’s a fine name, but let me get one thing straight, Internet: I DID NOT NAME MY SON AFTER A CHARACTER FROM A TEEN NOVEL. That’d just be ridiculous. I named him after a track meet. I bet you feel pretty silly now, everyone. Oh, and that doesn’t have anything to do with my absence. I’m just sayin’.

So, that’s my deal. I had to come back, though, because I actually have a story. About RUNNING. I have run 4 of the last 5 days. I know! Shocking, but true. Today, I was running along and wondering what kind of day today would be. Busy/crazy/stressful/sad/bad…or normal, which is more of simply a busy/crazy? I was mulling this and marveling over the un-fun humidity when a splat sounded beside me. It was a bird. A bird tried to crap on me, y’all. “The best part of waking up, is a bird trying to unload on your head when you finally find the motivation to haul yourself out of bed at 5:45 and go run!” Isn’t that how that jingle goes?

To get an idea of how close this encounter was, please see the helpful, highly advanced visual below:
| ___ |
| m*_ |
| * __ |
| ___ |

The “m” is me, courteously running on the left side of the sidewalk so as to share the road with any other early-morning runners. The asterisk beside me represents the first attempt, which scared the good golly out of me and made me pull up from surprise. That decrease in speed saved me from the second attempt, which landed directly in front of me. If I hadn’t slowed down, I would have been hit. Ew.

Was it a review of my performance? An “angry bird”? I don’t know, but it made me miss the possibly rabid skunk I ran with earlier this summer.

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One response

  1. Brilliant. Simply brilliant. And thanks for the documentation of the advice, sis. I was actually hoping somebody had done that because I had forgot to. 🙂

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