Dear People Who ARE Moving into the House Three Away from Ours:
Hello, again. In my previous letter, I listed all of the very good reasons why we should become great friends. These included our cute baby, general awesomeness, and ability to keep our property well-maintained. I admit that I had an ulterior motive — “borrowing” your basketball goal, as our driveway is not conducive to installing one.
Well, we’ve had a development. First, you (whoever you are) have bought the house. The sign out front went from “contract pending” to not being there at all, so……….CONGRATULATIONS! I hope you like the neighborhood and the house. Unfortunately, another development is the fact that the previous owners of the house have ABSCONDED WITH THE BASKETBALL GOAL. Crap!
Who DOES that? Well, we can still be friends. Might I suggest, though, that you might want something to cover up the concrete slab with bolts sticking out of it? What better than…say…a basketball goal? Perfect!
Good luck with your move, future neighbor.