Fears? That’s not as fun to talk about as loves, but more fun than coming up with secrets, I guess.
- That something will happen to LilRunr. That’s got to be every mother’s worst nightmare. This includes, but is not limited to: kidnapping, choking, broken bones, broken hearts, illness, autism, ANYTHING that might happen at daycare, rashes, bad attitudes, poor social skills…there are lots of things to worry about, some less likely than others. I try to put it aside and just be a happy, fully-present, relaxed mama…but ooh boy, is it hard.
- Huntington’s. Ten years ago, most people would have no idea what this is, but thanks to shows like “House” it’s not as unheard of as it once was. Perhaps one day, there will be a cure for it. Unfortunately, I’m familiar with the disease for a more personal reason — it runs in the family. I’ve lost several family members to it, and “losing them” is by far the most accurate term, as HD takes and takes and takes little pieces of the victim, trapping them in a body they can’t control. I know that other families may have similar odds concerning heart disease, cancer, or any of the other illnesses that plague our world, but some days the “if your parent has it you have a 50/50 chance of getting HD yourself” really feels like a curse. Of course, it does no good to fear it. To live my best life, this is definitely a situation where seeing the glass as “half full” is the only option.
- Walking in between parked cars. If cars are parked so that their front bumpers are facing each other, I will not walk in between them. I just have this image of one of them somehow slipping out of park, rolling into me, and crushing my legs. Unlikely? Yes. Horrible? Also yes.
- That new Prius commercial. You know what I’m talking about, right? It’s the “Prius goes plural” commercial where a bigger person is made up of a bunch of different people. Seriously creepy. That thing gives me nightmares.
- Speaking of nightmares…how about those previews for scary movies? I have a vivid imagination, and previews for horror films give me JUST enough input to scare myself senseless. This one time, a guy I work with was having a slow day so he watched “Paranormal Activity” with his headphones on. I had a clear view of his computer screen, and I didn’t get a full night’s sleep for two weeks after it. I love Fall, but TV commercials in October are not my friend.
- Ants. I hate ants. There was this incident when I was little…I was helping my dad clean some junk out of a shed, and I picked up an old pipe. Said old pipe happened to be an ant plantation (“farm” just doesn’t cover it), and the nasty critters crawled all over me. There’s something about the swarm that is seriously unsettling. Then, I moved to South Carolina and had a couple of minor run-ins with FIRE ANTS. Yeah. They were bad enough as creepy crawlies, and now they’re armed. HATE them.
- Running by myself. Two to three miles solo isn’t a problem…but those long runs during marathon training tended to scare me when I was alone. I would jump at leaves rustling, look suspiciously at other runners/bikers/walkers on the Swamp Rabbit Trail, and yet long for other pedestrians during those dreary, cold days. So alone.
- Door-to-door salesmen. I don’t like strangers coming to my house. The teenagers who claim to be selling magazines are the worst. It seems so shady.